Sincerely, Amber: Advice Column 2

In the second installment of the Advice Column, Gillian answers questions regarding friend drama and mental health.

What are some healthy coping mechanisms? Sincerely, Stretched Thin

Dear Stretched Thin,

Having a healthy way to cope with stress, depression, grief, and more is vitally important. I’m glad you’re curious about what options you have that are beneficial to you.

First thing, having a healthy coping mechanism means it doesn’t harm your physical or mental health. For example, smoking is not a healthy coping mechanism. Some of the best ways to deal with stress are unplugging from the world, like walking or getting off your phone.

It’s important to figure out what you like. I find taking a good walk around my neighborhood (when it’s not raining), helps improve my mood significantly; but you might be someone who doesn’t like that. Try a couple of things out. If it’s stress from school that’s getting you down, take a break from studying and take a walk. Clean a part of your house you’ve been putting off (like your room). Turn on some music and listen carefully. Make yourself a snack and look out a window. Try to avoid looking at your phone, and explore parts of your home you weren’t aware of before.

If you’re feeling sad, maybe over a breakup or a family emergency, it’s time to treat yourself. Turn on your favorite film, make yourself a tray of your favorite snacks (I like to make popcorn and cut up some green apples), and relax on the couch. Don’t worry about other things; you do you.

If you’re feeling depressed and this feeling has persisted for more than two weeks, you should go and talk to a trusted adult about getting some help. When it comes to depression, some simple coping mechanisms aren’t going to help you in the long run.

Sincerely, Gillian


What do I do to help a friend of mine who always gets in trouble? Sincerely, Watching from the Sidelines

Dear Watching from the Sidelines,

One part of friendship (really any relationship) is open communication. If your friend getting into trouble means YOU get into trouble, it’s time to have a conversation. You need to tell them how it makes you feel, and how it’s a bit destructive to catch yourself in drama regularly. Say: “I love you and want to continue our friendship, but it impacts me when you constantly get into trouble like this.”

If your friend is just someone who gets themselves in trouble, but you’re not apart of it, that’s a different story. It’s okay to voice your concerns, telling them that you find it exhausting to see them regularly tied up in drama. It’s also okay to evaluate your friendship. People who have trouble surrounding them will pull you into their hurricane. Sometimes the most beautiful people have the messiest lives, and you might need to evaluate if you want to continue putting up with it or if you want to move on. It’s okay to say, “I need to step away from this friendship for my health.” It’s not saying you’re abandoning this person; you’re just allowing yourself some breathing space.

Sincerely, Gillian


Can we impeach ASB members? Sincerely, Active Voter

Dear Active Voter,

I don’t believe you can impeach ASB members. I’d be curious to hear as to why you want to. I know of people removed from office, but it’s because the school administration personally takes them out of office. One high school re-elected their ASB president after concerning comments concerning school shootings. If you seriously don’t like how ASB is run, possibly consider trying out for it the next year?

Sincerely, Gillian