Absorption awaits all in attendance

Alpaca Club spreads its message as Packies united in the library yesterday.

Though it was released last year, “Alpaca Evolution,” a game available to iOS and Android devices, has just now found an official residence in West Linn High School.  Yesterday, members of the Alpaca Club, a new addition to WLHS dedicated to playing and sharing “evolutions,” communed in the library at 12:02 p.m.  Meetings will continue to be held on Thursdays, with the location to be announced.


The game follows the storyline of a mutant alpaca that, when it “absorbs” a fellow alpaca, advances towards an evolution.  With one tap or swipe, an alpaca is knocked out; one more tap or swipe, and it is consumed.  Once enough alpacas are absorbed, the alpaca “evolves”; that is, it adapts a new, less biologically detectable anatomy.  There are 11 evolutions in a “round” and an indefinite amount of rounds.


“It was so good,” Colin Squires, sophomore and Vice President of Alpaca Club, said. “We had a great agenda.  We got everyone to do the Packy Pledge.”


The “Packy Pledge,” which was used to induct members, is the following:


Together we are the Packy’s

Standing proud and strong

With all of us together

Nothing can go wrong.


“Consuming alpaca souls is the best thing that ever happened,” Kenney Whitbey, senior and President of the Alpaca Club, said.  “Alpaca lovers can join.  Even if you don’t like the app, you can just love alpacas and join.”


At the first meeting, members were initiated when they downloaded Alpaca Evolution, but there are no other prerequisites.  While Whitbey expected over 20 participants, around 35 showed.  New members are welcome.


“We’re thinking a good 11 evolutions per week would be a good idea to keep people in [the club],” Whitbey said.  “We don’t want any slackers.”


In addition to downloading the app, new members participated in trivia.  One of the questions was, “What do alpacas eat?”  Options were “new shoes,” “old shoes” and “grass.”  Members received “Alpaca gum,” which was gum scribed with the letters “ALPACA GUM.”


“There’s gonna be videos at the next ones.  Cute alpacas and ugly alpacas,” Whiteby said.  “Nobody was disappointed.  I think there’s going to be twice as many people at the next meeting.”


Elections may be held at the next meeting for positions such as Secretary of Defense and Treasurer.  The positions of President and Vice President, however, are reserved exclusively for Whitbey and Squires.


Squires started playing the game the week before Spring Break, and, realizing the game participants to “become more powerful than any earthly thing,” quickly shared it with Whitbey.  Squires, who claims that two evolutions (relatively speaking, less than 10 minutes of playing the game) are enough to “entice” gamers, said he and Whitbey simultaneously created the Alpaca Club while at lacrosse practice.


“It was a revelation,” Squires said.  “It came upon us.  We also thought about quitting school and going into a business selling hats and t-shirts and making Alpaca University.”
The club will also be supplemented by additional apps from the same company, including “I am Giraffe” and “Alpaca Evolution Begins.”